Can I marry her...pleeaassee?

When a man proposes to a woman, it is expected that the girl’s parents should have some say in the matter...at least in the nineteenth century. In the comical dialogue between Lady Bracknell and Jack, they discuss Jack’s character in response to his proposal to Gwendolen. This dialogue seems to be pretty moral, both in the way Jack answers as well as the way Lady Bracknell questions him.

The first question is whether or not Jack smokes. It seems that Jack hesitates to answer when he responds “Well, yes, I must admit I smoke” (17). It seems as if Jack hesitates, because he seems to be worried that Lady Bracknell would put a check against him. However, Gwendolen’s mom seems to take it in stride and say “a man should always have an occupation” which is not at all the response anticipated.

Lady Bracknell approves of Jack’s age, and asks him a trick question: Whether he knows everything or nothing. Once again, Jack answers correctly by stating that he knows nothing. This interview type discussion continues, as Jack seems to please Lady Bracknell more and more. If the dialogue was cut before Jack is asked about his parents, then it could be looked at as moral. Lady Bracknell expresses morality by just seeming to look after her daughter, and trying to make sure Jack is of good character for her. Jack, on the other hand, is also moral because his answers please her and show him as having good character.

However, once Lady Bracknell asks Jack about his parents, the morality of the situation quickly changes. Jack tells her that he doesn’t have parents, which is nothing he can do anything about; he believes them to be dead. Jack wants nothing more than to be with Gwendolen, but Lady Bracknell “suggests” that he must find some sort of relations before the end of the season. Lady Bracknell is too worried about social standing and her daughter marrying a man without parents rather than her happiness. That is quite immoral.